Are You Allowing Your Work to Ruin Your Dates?

Despite how much society has progressed over the last century in terms of women’s rights, it still is quite a man’s world out there, even if it’s a subject that is not openly discussed. This often means that if women want to stand a chance of getting ahead in their careers, then they have to be as masculine as the men they are competing against. In many cases they have to come across as even stronger because of their gender.

The problem, though, is that many women bring this attitude home with them. It becomes so ingrained that they act they same way with men in all areas of their life, including their personal life. While being masculine with your best guy friend is great, trying to compete and do battle with a man you want to date will simply lead to disaster.

There is a reason men go out with women and want to have a relationship with them and it certainly isn’t because they want to feel as if they are on a battlefield all the time. You know you are a strong woman, you don’t have to project it by intimidating him and showing him you don’t need him from the start, when oftentimes quite the opposite is true.

However much you want to say that you are fine on your own and don’t need a man to look after you, we know that isn’t exactly true. After all, we are all hardwired to need a partner, someone to share our lives with. On the other hand, society has been teaching women that, essentially, femininity is a weakness and many women take it to the extreme because if they show weakness in their career then they will never be able to compete with their counterparts.

You need to ask yourself, though, what you really want. Are you looking for a partner, someone who will support you when you need it or comfort you when it all gets too much? Or are you looking for another adversary? You most likely don’t realize you do it, but try to take a step back and analyze yourself and your actions. Do you dress in your power suit that you use as a shield at work? Are you grilling him on your first date and trying to intimidate him with your accomplishments?

If you are, then you need to put the brakes on and let the woman inside you come out to play while you are with him. Remember that being feminine in your personal life is not a weakness, it is a strength. A men will do anything to make you happy because seeing you happy makes him feel fulfilled. Most men will tell you there is nothing sexier to them than a smile on the face of the woman they love that they put there.

But if you don’t let him see your feminine side and keep competing with him, then why should he want to date you? He might as well go out with his mates for a couple of beers and few games of pool, the result will be the same. However, if you are sexy and flirt with him, if you allow him to be a man by letting the part of you that wants to be taken care of shine through, you will be even sexier to him. Simply because he knows you are strong and independent but he will feel on top of the world that you are entrusting him with your care, and your heart.

 

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